I don't have time for this...

Now that my after work headache is subsiding…I would like to take a minute and be for real. None of my usual “Callie and Arizona” gifs and posts, no more pictures of our stupid cats being stupid haha

I have GOT to come out to my Dad…I have to. I cant put it off anymore and Im SO scared. Every time I think about it I get an insane sinking feeling in my chest and I immediately think of something else.

But lately, I have been noticing a shit ton of “so and so is now engaged to this other person” and I think 1. Ill totally never be able to be engaged and that sucks and 2. Since Im with the person I know I want to be with forever…My dad should know.

I just dont know how to go about it…I CANT tell him in person. But Im not going to tell him over the phone either :/ I thought about writing a letter. Actually WRITING one, not typing one or sending an email. I think its the easiest way for ME but is it for them? Id be telling my dad and my step mom, and Id let them make the decision whether or not they want to tell my 16 year old brother and 13 year old sister.

I have NO idea why Im making this such an insane deal in my head…I barely see or talk to them. I see them maybe once or twice a year. I should talk to them more…I know why I dont. And its bc I cant be myself and tell him things about my life.

I truly think that if I came out, and they accepted it, that I would have an INFINITELY closer relationship with them. But I cant get over this terrible feeling that they might NOT accept it…and then what? Nothing would really change bc I barely see them anyways…but I think knowing that my dad didnt accept me would totally crush me.

ANYWAYS…does anyone have any advice? What are your thoughts on me coming out to him in one long, meaningful letter?